I was wrecked last night and ended up falling asleep on the couch. I woke up to see Hannibal the Cannibal taking the scalp off Ray Liota’s head so that he could eat his brain while Ray sat there full conscious but completely souped up on morphine. Ray’s acting was superb, never before have I seen a person with half their skull removed deliver a performance with so much integrity and passion. Top work Ray!
I then flicked over to ESPN to see the new look Lakers in their first game of the season. I could hardly believe my eyes seeing the Mail Man run the floor in the Lakers uniform. The guy is 40 years old! Yet, he still looks like a supreme athlete. For years I have been calling for Malone Vs Tyson or perhaps Malone Vs Hollyfield to go 12 rounds! Don’t tell me that wouldn’t bring in the $$$ on pay per view! The Lakers are literally a billion dollar team, with Shaq, Malone, Payton and Bryant they are going to be hard to beat. Throw in Fisher, Fox, Russell and Grant and you’ve bought yourself a championship!

Delta is the new ONJ*!
When so many young female stars are more and more eager to show some skin rather than develop some talent (Holly Valance take note) Delta Goodrem stands out as a true performer with more than just a touch of class. I’m not a huge fan of her music but you have to respect the way she goes about it. She reminds me so much of the great one, ONJ. Both ladies have always sold themselves on talent, they both have a sweet and innocent image, they have both incorporated acting and singing into their careers, they have both had cancer and they even sound similar!

All Delta needs to do now is to be in a hit musical movie starring herself and John Travolta! I can picture it now. Grease 3! After Sandy is killed in a horrible pigeon attack, her best friend, Mandy (played by Delta Goodrem) comes to Rydell High to attend the funeral. A slightly older looking Danny Zuko (still played by John Travolta) falls for Mandy which creates conflict with the T-birds who are still trying to work out why “Grease is the word”. You heard it here first.

* If you didn’t know ONJ refers to Olivia Newton-John be ashamed.

Paulini, we will miss you.

I believe that in every persons life there is a time when they decide that the hairstyle they have now, is the one they will always have. No longer will they follow the trends and fashions of society. They have grown comfortable with their look and that is it, forever. They are taking that haircut to the grave!

When I see people in public that have obviously reached that time in their lives I like to approach them and have a guess at the year they decided to call it quits. 1985? 1963? 1972?

Many men are forced by nature to choose a different hairstyle at some point in their life. It is hard to maintain a fashionable 80’s flat top when you have nothing on top. (However, I have seen some good balding mullets.) As a result, it is often the women whose hairstyles of long gone decades stand out, the 60’s beehive, the 70s “Farah Fawcett” wave and the 80s perm.

I often ask myself the question, "When will I reach that moment in my life?" Have I reached it already? Currently the messy mop of hair over the ears that was fashionable in the late 60s is back in style and I just can’t bring myself to do it. I always laughed at old cogers who had reached their defining hair moment in that period and always had hair layered over their ears. Cricketer Richie Benaud for example, no one has seen Richie’s ears since 1955! Other offenders that come to mind are reporters Mike Gibson and George Negus.

So perhaps I have already had my last change? Or maybe I’ll just wait until the next new trend, I’m sure I’ll like that better, or maybe the one after that…or the one after that…