Need a vasectomy? Dr. Richard Chopp is your man!
Sunday, August 14, 2005
Something has been missing from my life for too long. It nearly became a distant memory. Bloody hell it feels good to hate the poms again. For so long they haven't been worth hating. We have moonlighted hating the Indians and the West Indies but it isn't the same. Nothing is better than beating the English on an Ashes tour. Getting up in the middle of a winter night to see Australia giving those stinking poms a bashing has brought balance to my life. It feels so right. I was in London in 2001 to see Australia beat England at Lords. It was good, I was happy, but something was missing. It wasn't quite taking candy from a baby, but it was close. Now that the Poms have been winning a few games and developing some backbone they think they can win, and that just makes them so much more fun to hate!
Thursday, June 23, 2005
Secrets
What is the nature of a secret? Something secret is only secret because someone else doesn't know about it. For example, what I ate for breakfast is a secret that not one other person on this earth knows. If I die right now, no-one would ever know, and it would be a secret forever. However, this does not mean that what I ate for breakfast is important. In fact, my breakfast menu is so inconsequential that I would not bother to tell you. You wouldn't care, and I don't care that you don't care, so everyone is happy. Right? No, wrong! I have recently discovered that some people expect to know these details!
But to those who must know everything no matter how unimportant I leave you with the following wise words by Henry Ward Beecher, "To know that one has a secret is to know half the secret itself."
What is the nature of a secret? Something secret is only secret because someone else doesn't know about it. For example, what I ate for breakfast is a secret that not one other person on this earth knows. If I die right now, no-one would ever know, and it would be a secret forever. However, this does not mean that what I ate for breakfast is important. In fact, my breakfast menu is so inconsequential that I would not bother to tell you. You wouldn't care, and I don't care that you don't care, so everyone is happy. Right? No, wrong! I have recently discovered that some people expect to know these details!
But to those who must know everything no matter how unimportant I leave you with the following wise words by Henry Ward Beecher, "To know that one has a secret is to know half the secret itself."
Sunday, June 12, 2005
Tom Cruise Has Lost It
Could Tom be anymore of a fruitloop? Ok, so he has the hots for Katie Holmes, but he isn't exactly Robinson Crusoe on that front. Sure they have a big difference in age, but lets just be glad that Katie is a regular woman and that Tom isn't in love with a farmyard animal. What is far more concerning to me is Tom's increasing devotion to the Church of Scientology! They believe that the head of the Galactic Confederation (76 planets founded 95 million years ago) solved overpopulation by mass implanting of aliens into humans bodies. So before we are too hard on Tom we should remember that his body is inhabited by the wandering souls of fried space aliens, and that can't be easy for anyone!
Could Tom be anymore of a fruitloop? Ok, so he has the hots for Katie Holmes, but he isn't exactly Robinson Crusoe on that front. Sure they have a big difference in age, but lets just be glad that Katie is a regular woman and that Tom isn't in love with a farmyard animal. What is far more concerning to me is Tom's increasing devotion to the Church of Scientology! They believe that the head of the Galactic Confederation (76 planets founded 95 million years ago) solved overpopulation by mass implanting of aliens into humans bodies. So before we are too hard on Tom we should remember that his body is inhabited by the wandering souls of fried space aliens, and that can't be easy for anyone!
Thursday, June 09, 2005
New Zealand's Russell Crowe
"I'm extremely sorry for this whole incident and I regret everything that took place," the New Zealand-born actor told Letterman. "The bottom line is I did something pretty stupid.
Have you noticed that the Australian media have started referring to Russell Crowe as "a New Zealand born actor"? And we all know it was the Random Ramble that started this campaign!
"I'm extremely sorry for this whole incident and I regret everything that took place," the New Zealand-born actor told Letterman. "The bottom line is I did something pretty stupid.
Have you noticed that the Australian media have started referring to Russell Crowe as "a New Zealand born actor"? And we all know it was the Random Ramble that started this campaign!
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